I think I'm too soft for a Man that I am

Recently I've been very bothered about myself. I'm a guy of around 30 but some things that still worry my heart is really disturbing. I will start like this.

1. Something embarrassing happened some time last year when I travelled home for visit. They bought a goat and was looking for who to kill it, me knowing I'm the most senior man at home jejely went into ghost mode, everyone started looking for me, in the end I had to come out but shamelessly told them I can't kill it. They had to call a 16 year old opposite neighbour to do it while my younger ones helped him hold the goat. I couldn't even stand the sight of seeing the goat struggling for life while receiving knife in the throat. I left there immediately. 

2. You might think it's normal for goat until I tell you that I can't kill a chicken or rat, last Christmas, I badly wanted to buy a life chicken because I beleive it's more healthy, but who will kill it? Bae was around, I don't want any embarrassment so I jejely bought frozen chicken . There is a wall gecko strolling around my room for weeks now, but I can't kill it, it becomes embarrassing any time I have a visitor

3. The most recent is, there are two birds trying to build a house in my lobby, I kept destroying the house but they didn't give up, it got to a point, I felt bad for the poor birds, what if they don't have a house? what if I'm the one building a house with all my strength and government keeps destroying it? I had to leave them to build. My neighbour said he killed the birds that tried doing that in his house but me can i do that? No. i just tire.

4. Lastly, When travelling and there's an accident, people rush out to watch but I dare not else the trauma will remain for months, I can't stand the sight of blood and body cuts. 

Any time I think about killing an animal, I ask myself, what if I'm the one being held by boko haram or killer herdsmen and about to be slaughtered? How excruciating the pain can be.

Any time I think about crushing a cockroach, I ask myself, what if I'm the one trying to cross the high way and dangote trailer crushes me? 

So guys, am I normal? Do I need to see a doctor or a psychologist?