In Nigeria, we have this mentality that it's not right for a man to marry a woman who is older than him or marry a lady he is of the same age with. This simple mentality has caused what could have been a good marriage not to happen. The issue of age in marriage shouldn't be something we have to be considerate about in this modern age and time. That our parents don’t support it does not mean you should not marry who you like because of the age differences.
There have been situations where a man dates a lady for so long and ends up calling the relationship off because he can't marry who is older than him or who is of the same age with him because of what people would say. This act needs to stop, we have to understand that there's more to marriage than age. A woman that is of the same age as you might have a better understanding of life than the small girl you want to go and marry. That lady who is older than you might end up treating you better than the sweet 16 you are looking for.
Some men that are looking for younger girls are merely looking for slaves and girls they can control like a TV remote not knowing that those older women can be very submissive without streaming you at all. Some men will say ”If I marry a girl older than me or a girl that is of the same age as me, when I get old who would take care of me”. To me, that is a poor man's mentality, if you are rich why would you care about your wife taking care of you when you can pay maids to do the work in the house including cooking.
Peter Okoye of the defunct P-square that married a lady that is 3 years older than him, are they not living happily. They are of course enjoying their marriage because they did not put the age at the front of their marriage. They let their age differences to slide while they enjoy each others company.
5 Things that are more important in marriage than age are listed and discussed below:
1. Understanding:
For any marriage to survive the test of time, understanding is key not age. You might marry someone that you are 10 years older than as a man and she doesn't understand you a bit, you guys will be having issues almost every single day. Understanding matters a lot in marriage. Understanding is what will make your wife know that you are working tirelessly to put food on the table without her questioning or interrogating your whereabouts. If your wife understands how hard you work, she won't nag all time when you don't have her time because she understands. Lack of understanding in marriages has led to many divorces and not age. I've never heard that a man divorced his wife because of her age.
2. Love:
Love is one beautiful and powerful thing that is very important in any marriage than age. A young girl might decide to marry you because of your wealth and not because she loves you. If you love that woman you want to marry, you won’t see age as a barrier to the success of the marriage. Love is more important in marriage than age. I strongly believe that love, trust and understanding is what is keeps Peter Okoye and his wife not their age. So dear men, Age is not but numbers, marry who you love forget her age.
3. Trust:
Every successful marriage was built on trust and not age. If your partner trusts you so much with all her heart, there's no need to think about her age. Would you prefer marrying a young girl that doesn't trust you or marrying a lady of the same age that trusts you? I bet you will choose someone that trusts you. So, if you know you would choose someone that trusts you, you have to be blinded by her age.
4. Been Faithful:
Nobody likes infinity in marriage. Younger girls tend to be more unfaithful in marriages today than the older ones. The older ones have seen and experienced life in different ways, that when they marry the things of this world doesn't entice them again like the younger ones who barely have life experiences. If your partner is faithful to you, there's no need to consider his/her age when marriage comes knocking.
5. The ability to forgive and forget:
Some marriages that hit the rock was because of one partner's inability to forgive or forget a certain wrong that has been done to them by their partner. Some women, most especially the younger ones, see cheating on a cheating husband as a way of paying him back for his wrong. A mature lady who loves, trusts and understands the husband will have the capacity to forgive him when he goes wrong. She will also have the ability to forget and not revenge.
All these written above and more are more important in a marriage than a ladies age or the man's age. We have to come to that stage in this country where we have to learn to embrace what we like and not have a second thought about what others think. We have to learn to love and marry whoever we love not minding the person’s age. There's more to this life that a woman's age in marriage. That older woman might be the source of joy for the man.
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